Dear Subconscious

Dear Subconscious,

If I tell you I’m okay, could you please believe me and not try and tell me otherwise by giving me stomach pains, making my whole body itch or sharing those disturbing dreams with me?

I would quite like to move on and I feel like you’re holding me back. Why are you doing that? Don’t you want us to be happy? I have the tools, but we have to work together. Can you just believe in me and let me hold the reins for a while? Of course I appreciate that you’re looking out for me, but you’re trying to wrap me in cotton wool and it’s doing more harm than good.

Oh Subconscious, if you could loosen the shackles just a little then I would not face every day with anxiety. I wouldn’t have to over think every little thing and have constant worries over things that haven’t happened yet, or most likely won’t even come to pass. 

I know you bear all of the burdens and you remember so I can forget. You don’t have to forget if you don’t want to, but you CAN move forwards. It’s scary I know but look, I’m already doing it. It’s not as scary as you might think, the world isn’t all that bad. There is good and we’ve been looking in the right places and finally found it.

I know you’re trying to help, but I’m a big girl and I can handle what the world throws at me. You’ve seen what I’ve been through and I’m still here, so maybe we can let go of those things now, what do you say? I’m ready, are you? Let’s do it, let’s finally move on and not let the past dictate our future. If I believe in you, will you believe in me?

Until next time, take care.

-Sara 

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